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Need some words of wisdom

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  • Need some words of wisdom

    HI ALL its my first post here, my fiance has renal failure and has home dialysis everyday, we moved in together 3 months ago and then i realised how much he has gone through on his own.
    I now care for him (when he lets me as hes very independant) he needles himself and i remove them, my 5 yr old is alongside him eating and chatting whilst dialysing. He has good and bad days, he has had 2 transplants and both have failed (he has fsjs).

    Obviously he has a fistula which has matured greatly, now our children arent his by blood they are from my first marriage which isnt a problem, they have regular contact with their grandparents but not their "father". grandparents had them today and brought them back, my partner had gone to darts, so they started "condescending" the pipework in our house was terrible etc.... then was me and my partner getting on ok and FINALLY poor thing have you seen the state of his arm!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my god, i said well they aint that big you know and they continued yes they are two large lumps blah blah blah

    Now im feeling really down, hes very aware of people staring and makes him upset and me too as we are normal people living normal lives, problem is i dont want to tell him as will hit the roof and be very asleep, but, i talk in my sleep

    i so badly want to protect him from all the bad in this world i love him so much

    words fail me

  • #2
    Re: Need some words of wisdom

    Don't worry too much about them. Just remember it takes a little person to pick apart another person. Fortunately/unfortunately grandparents have no say in how their grand children are raised and you are not obligated to live your life according to them or raise your children according to them.

    The only thing you have to remember is you love the person you are with and not to belittle the grandparents in front of the kids. other than that let is slide off (easier said than done) and enjoy your new life with the person you love

    Husband, Dave, IgAN end stage
    PD dialysis since March of 2009.


    • #3
      I know the feeling. It is a self esteem issue.
      He has to say it is what it is and accept the fact he has renal failure.